my first and last birthday party was my 5th. it was a cool party (by my five year old standards) where i had lots of balloons and party games to keep my cousins and neighbours entertained. i got to wear a nice baby blue dress and the group photo that we took that day of all the kids at the party remains to be one of the highlights from my childhood photo album.
but i digress.
growing up, one of the biggest fears in my life was to hold a birthday party … and have nobody show up. “rubbish!” a friend once told me. “of course people will turn up.” well, i never did find out because i never went to organise one. the excuse i gave myself is that birthday parties involve too much logistics, and i didn’t want to trouble my family. (yeah…right.)
i got reminded of this because after i sent my first two Facebook messages to invite people to my wedding and ask for their mailing addresses, i felt scared. scared that they won’t reply. scared that they’ll pretend not to see my message. (i did that once to an ex-colleague’s wedding a few years back… silly me 😦 don’t ever do that! at least come up with a legit[sounding] excuse) scared that everyone will say no, sorry, can’t make it. haha. and i recognised the fear to come from the same place that never desired to throw a birthday party for myself.
i feel really silly because i should have more confidence in myself, but this is the truth. stripped down bare. heh.
anyway, i told myself to start off the whole invitation process with a big, fat, BISMILLAHIRRAHMANIRRAHIM. because i know from my own experience that inviting people to your wedding isn’t as simple as asking for addresses and sending out or passing them cards. there are soooo many ways a guest can be offended. personally, my number one pet peeve is late invites. once i have to cancel my weekend plans (and sometimes bubble other people) for a friend’s late notice wedding, i get pissed. but torn, because i DO want to be there for their wedding. i’ve been offended by invites addressed to “ninja groom and partner,” especially this one case where the groom and i were friends FIRST. or even when the host knows my name and i wonder to myself “why did he/she refer to me as ‘partner’???” and then there’s the other scenarios i’ve seen, where my friend goes “wait, he invited you but he didn’t invite ME?” (insert awkward silence) or another friend sorta complains that she didn’t get her own card just because her boyfriend is the bride’s cousin even though you know, she and the bride had been friends for over 10 years. so yeah, macam-macam lah. so here’s to not stepping on anybody’s toes, as far as possible.