drafting the wedding programme

my typical kraken thought process goes like this:

“I need to accomplish X for the wedding. but it’s too early. so I will do it in a few months’ time”
“but you already thought like that for Y and Z. you are gonna be swamped in a few months’ time”
“hmmm betul jugak eh. might as well do now if I can.”

so that was how I started drafting my wedding programme lulz. it was by chance that one evening I realised I had two admin programmes for 1-day receptions on my desk. one was a close friend’s who got married in end-Aug, and the other was ninja groom’s sister’s who got married recently. so I glanced at them for some intel and then started drafting mine. heh.

I’ve seen programmes which have got details such as who’s in charge of what task down to a T. macam on one hand (I’m gonna be super honest) I wanna judge them for being so bridezilla and control freak-y, but on the other hand, I know the devil is in the details and it’s these things that help keep a wedding run smoothly.

so while I’ve decided on the key programme items, my wedding is still a little too far for me to start nominating (read: arrowing) people for specific tasks. I hope to keep my programme flow as least manpower intensive as possible for my siblings/close friends. and ideally I can relax and truly delegate on my wedding day instead of still whispering instructions while on the dais. we shall see how this goes!

guidelines for drafting a wedding programme

if you’re like me and you think drafting a programme from scratch — while still taking reference from others — is more fun, here’s the list of guidelines I considered when drafting mine. keep in mind that insyaAllah my reception is on a Sat morning-afternoon, and ninja groom’s is on a Sat night. we’ll have 3 outfits: nikah, sanding I and sanding II. our houses and reception venues are max 10 mins away from each other. also, I currently have no plans for cake cutting.

1. start/end of reception: planning to nikah at 11am so it’s not too early for faraway relatives, with the reception ending at 6pm as requested by mama kraken. ninja groom’s reception will be from 5pm to 10pm, but we’ll appear only from 7.45pm/8.00pm onwards

2. photo taking on pelamin: allocated 2h overall for mine. I noticed that both reference programmes allocated 1.5-2h too, and that on both actual days there were no long queues for the pelamin. planning to get more mileage out of my nikah outfit so will be lingering on pelamin for an hour, instead of ciao-ing almost immediately

3. makan time: both reference programmes allocated 30 mins, so ok lor I follow. din realise it’s so short! sempat tak kalau nak makan crepes?? ok just kidding.

4. change of outfit part 1: seems like 1.5h is safe, if you can afford it. minimum seems to be 1h, but also assuming the mak andam is a seasoned pro and that the outfit doesn’t involve a complex sanggul lintang. I’d noticed that one of the brides took much longer than the other to change out.

5. saying goodbye: I feel that the earliest “polite” time for the pengantin to leave, if not rushing off to the partner’s reception, is 4.30pm. plan to bring ninja groom to salam-salam relatives before we make our way home. actually I wanted to make ninja groom a family tree to help him remember who’s who, but mama kraken was like “sudah lah, salam2 aje. it will take some time to betul2 ingat. dulu mak pun sama. semua adik beradik papa kraken mak tak kenal.” considering my dad has like 10 siblings, I can only imagine how kecoh it must have been.

the bare bones programme

11.00am – nikah
11.30am – end of nikah / start of photo taking / start of reception ie food should be ready
12.00pm – official start of reception (as indicated in invites)
12.30pm – leave to change outfits
1.50pm – kraken to be seated at dais / groom to meet pengapit and kompang boys
2.00pm – sanding ie hadang, silat, salam parents etc
2.30pm – photo taking
3.00pm – makan
3.30pm – resume photo taking
4.00pm – salam-salam / mingle-mingle
4.30pm – leave for kraken’s house

intermission
4.45pm – eat, pray, and er… mandi. insyaAllah I will get my MUA to reapply makeup from about 6pm onwards. meanwhile, it’s nap time for ninja groom. (have you guys seen pengantin lelaki-s stealing naps while their brides get ready?! I have, and I think mine will be no exception!)

meanwhile…
6.00pm – end of kraken’s reception / family to pack up and get ready for night reception (I have already started begging mama kraken to keep the logistics simple so that they can pack up fast. for example, I’m telling her not to over-order berkats because a lot of receptions tend to have leftovers. ni yang leceh nak bawa balik!)

groom’s reception
7.45pm – march in at ninja groom’s reception, together with kraken’s family and closest relatives
10.00pm – end!

next, to settle the Ys and Zs to ease any possible crunch time…

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